I've always wanted to have one of those anonymous advice columns, where people would write to me and I'd find solutions to their problems, and they wouldn't know who I was :]

I am really really dreading the last weeks of school... they're always the worst. I have a 5 page paper due, a whole bunch of film assignments for my journal, business plan and presentation, and all the finals for all my classes... in a 2 week period. Its horrible how the worst blows come last, after I'm all tired out from 6 months of school and super ready for vacation. And I cant give up yet, that'd be like forfeiting 6 months of work.

I'm still really unsure about what major I should be in... is business really what I want to get into? I hate math... i really dislike structure, except for assignments.. i hate manipulation (minus Blair Waldorf) and asking people for favors... What else would I do with my life? =/ Medical field? Am i dedicated enough? (if I'm asking myself if I'm dedicated enough, it's less likely that I am.) It seems like everything I like, is really hard to get into. And has a high failure rate. "What do you want to do?" "I don't know.." I think my fear of commitment is showing. What if I devote myself entirely to a career and totally fail at it?

And I dont like putting school problems into here, but I'm stressing myself to tears over this.

I have made a pact with myself to not go online for 2 weeks! (Except livejournal, i need livejournal! and homework purposes) Because I think I use the internet way too much, and the rest of this my-face-is-glued-to-my-screen generation uses the internet/television way too much. I think our parents are onto something when they talk about the "good ol days" without electric. I mean, the internet sure has helped us in a whole bunch of ways, but I dont think a lot of people look back and realize how much our lifestyle's changed. We used to play tag and hopscotch, run around playgrounds or explore cities, have treehouses and hiding places and secret clubhouses, play sports, hang around malls when we're bored... talk on the phone.. It's not like all of that has gone extinct, but we do them all SO much less, since everything became virtually available. And I look at kids and feel like it's so tragic how theyre glued to their laptops or iPods or cellphones. Kids are supposed to spend childhood exploring the world, not holed up inside watching other people live life on television, or wasting away on a video game level.... Have we gotten THAT unimaginative and lazy that we cant think of anything else to do? Sometimes I wish the world would just stop technologically improving. Websites like Facebook do a lot of good but they're also saddening in a way. And gosh, nobody EVER sends letters anymore. I miss letters.



Hiding behind sarcasm and judgment is the safest place to be. When you think everything is stupid, when you think and act like you've got everyone and everything figured out, there's no room in between for getting hurt. You never know when someone you put all your trust in will turn on you, but you gotta keep in mind that indifference is a cold road, full of never-ending detours that last forever. Being indifferent never solved anything, all it's done is make others insecure or drag out problems. The world could REALLY use more people with their heart on their sleeves, who aren't afraid to say that they've fallen head over heels madly in love with someone, and they "can't imagine their life without them". Love is only love, if you can't live without the person. Call me old fashioned but I will stand by that statement, even if it means dying alone in this world of warped values. I will never EVER settle for anything less than that, because it's not crazy, it's not creepy or awkward or pathetic. It's love. And I swear, the further we get into the future, &the more sarcastic and slutty and indifferent and lust-obsessed society gets, the more distant it becomes.



One > None



I reread previous entries sometimes and I sound cynical =X If I sound like someone talking in a way that screams "I KNOW EVERYTHING, LISTEN TO ME", that's totally not me. I'm usually unsure about things, which is why I have so many random opinions about things. One week I could have an opinion on something, and the next week I'd have an opposing opinion to my previous opinion. My mind cant make itself up? I can't figure myself out sometimes. Are people supposed to have one grounded opinion about everything? Or is having 2 opinions (or 3 opinions, or opinions that waver with the seasons) normal? I dont mean to sound cynical.


My mind wanders a lot around 12-1. If I ever wrote a book, I'd have writers block all day, then night would hit, it'd be time to sleep, and my fingers would fly over the keyboard.
It makes me wonder if i should be a writer. i always believed that i shouldnt be, since i don't have the patience to write. but when i write in here, i don't need patience -- words just flow~ i wonder if that's what Stephenie Meyer felt when she was writing Twilight.

"But when a story demands to be written, there's no way to resist. "
^I wish I had the talent to make a story come alive.



Owl City gives me chills.






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Honestly, I couldnt care less about Robert Pattinson, he's not Edward Cullen :P He's a cool guy, he's a nice guy, but he just plays a part.. and i don't get how some people can't make that distinction. I mean, I know what its like to obsess over something, but... why keep tabs on Kristen and Robert? They're actors... I guess Kristen and Robert and all the other actors are the closest thing Twilighters have to reality, of Twilight. Except for fans who think he's hot, LOL, they like him for him, even if it's just his looks.
I'm so so SO so glad for the new director! THANK YOU CHRIS WEITZ, the old guy was horrible X___X Film class taught me that directors are everything. Or almost everything :P Well, they're at least half the process. I still wouldnt pick Robsten if I chose the characters in the first place, but REGARDLESS! Oh my god, what a breathtaking story!!! SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH

I WANT AN EDWARD CULLEN! or more like I want a Joe Cullen. That so doesnt flow. Joseph Cullen? LOL, I can feel Jonas fans everywhere sending me death glares.

Twilight's success proves that people would do anything for love. They'd even wish they were in Bella's place, &anyone who's read the books knows Bella does NOT have it easy. The public's reaction to it is like.. a twisted but beautiful reality of how the heart works. <3 Bunches of fans wish for an Edward Cullen, vampire and all, because it's so hard to find regular guys anything like Edward Cullen. Twilight wouldn't be as popular as it is if it was an everyday story, if guys like that were everywhere... And how the Twilight fanbase encompasses more than just one age group, because this isn't just a story about vampires and werewolves, it's a reminder of the basic foundation of love itself. "Not being able to live in a world where the person you love doesn't exist." Simple, obvious, yet people in this day and age have TOTALLY lost sight of it. Twilight fans get it though. They're so admirably honest with themselves. :)
Honestly, I don't believe that anyone doesn't want to love and be loved. Nobody really truly believes that it's overrated. People who criticize love are either too scared to be rejected and most likely, too scared to admit that they're too scared to be rejected, OR they've failed at trying to find it, however many times, so they've closed themselves off and given up.
You can tell whether or not someone's insecure by the way they talk about love (and the way they talk when you're in an argument, but that's worthy of a totally different paragraph). And I gotta say, speaking from experience, usually the people who joke about themselves saying "I KNOW HAHAHA, I'm so awesome right ;D" are the most insecure and closed off people, deep down. And if I ever told anyone that, they'd probably give me examples like "Nuh uh, ____ isn't insecure!" Yeah, that's what you think. They might not even realize (or want to realize) that they're insecure themselves. But realizing it is the first step on the road to recovery. Insecure people are often somewhat of perfectionists too, and/or they're easily influenced by the pressures of society. AHHH offtopicness!!! My mind wanders a lot~ Of course, someone can be insecure and not repressed, which I think is a million times better than being insecure and repressed. At least non-repressed insecure people get it out and are open with their feelings. I mean, everyone has a certain degree of insecurity, nobody's perfect... why strive to be?
Mark my words (do I sound like an author yet?), anyone who thinks love is overrated has NEVER EXPERIENCED IT.


I'm proud of Twilighters and Jonas fans, and pretty much all the fanbases society flings judgment upon. Like if you're a Jonas fan, you supposedly don't know anything about good music, or if you're a Twilighter you're supposedly pathetic and drooling over whats "just a book/movie". It takes a lot to admit you're a huge fan, to have enough self-confidence to not flinch in opinion when society's judgments are immediately thrust upon you and to be grouped into a simple-minded interpretation of who you are, based on what everyone else may be. But you do it because whatever it is has changed your life, it's the truth, it's a part of you, and hiding your love for it would be lying to yourself. That's bravery to me. It takes a lot of courage to show the world who you are, risking being conformed to those stereotypes that may or may not be true, but believing that you are who you are and no amount of social pressure or ridicule can change that... that's strength. Schoolkids that wear baggy pants and walk around pretending to be tough, they're kidding themselves. Anyway my bottom line is, people can derive inspiration from anything at all, whether it be a book, band, person, quote, whatever. &Obsession fosters strength! Well, up to a certain point, then it's unhealthy. LOL.
Whether or not obsession is a good thing depends on how you feel about it all. If someone loves Twilight so much that they spiral into a pit of depression over the fact that it's not real, not good. If it makes them happy, feeds their sense of adventure, reinforces their belief in love, sets a standard for future boyfriends and relationships... ^_^ <3

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How Deep Is Your Love - the bird and the bee</div>

JUST FINISHED WATCHING NEW MOON WITH SOPHIE AND HUYEN, THIS MOVIE BEATS TWILIGHT, LIKE 43810568301 TIMES OVER. HOOOLY CRAP. Maybe its cuz I was so into it, but... WOW
Jasper actually said 18 words this time. LOL! 18 to 3.


WOW
I really tried to like it though, because i love the books so much, and gave it a chance in my mind. i bet the hater guy talking to us before had a sucky time. Am i the only one who can manipulate the way I see things by changing m attitude or trying to like them, or is that a human thing? I tried to like Twilight too and it did NOT work out. Eurgh, still hate it, i feel like Twilight the movie butchered (one of) my favorite book series. but THIS! JFWKGHEFJAWRNKVDA <3 <3 THANK YOU GOD, for crazy Twilight fans who buy all the merchandise and went to see Twilight 5 million times and rocketed it up to the point where NEW MOON WAS ALLOWED TO HAVE A BIG BUDGET. Because without those crazy Twilighters, I think this movie would have even further butchered (one of) my favorite book series. But it was AMAAAAAZING. I think they changed directors, no more corny Jasper stares! I tried to learn about Robert Pattinson too, before this movie. I watched interviews and I know i'm never gonna think he's hot/cute/attractiveinanyway, but it'd be cool to hang with him in a coffeehouse. Hes the type who hates all the attention, very personable and all. :] I still feel bad that his fanbase only likes him because he's Edward. MANNNNNNNNN THAT WAS SO FREAKIN GOOOODDDD. I'm probably biased by my love of the books, but AHHHHH <3 IM GLAD TO BE BIASED, ITS WAY MORE FUN. I think I partially know what it feels like to be a Twilighter, at least for now. It sucks, theres this dread hanging over my head, how in about 3 years or less, the whole thing is gonna end. The Jonas Brothers are gonna live as long as me, but when you're a Twilight fan, you KNOW its gonna end in less than 3 years. That must really REALLY freakin suck for them. And at the end of New Moon, it was like *cliffhanger* then BAM CREDITS! And the whole theater was like AUGHHHH! And I think me and Sophie screamed NOOOOOOOO the loudest!!! BAHAHAHA, WOWOWOWOWOWOW THAT WAS SO GOOD, I HATE THAT IT HAD TO END! Also, with Jonas you can save up a whole bunch of dinero and it's your decision, how many concerts you wanna go to, what you save up for, they have TV shows, movies, CDs coming out CONSTANTLY. And Twilight fans, one movie a year, and one soundtrack to go with that movie, and theres only 2 movies/years left, or maybe 3 of they decide to split Breaking Dawn into 2 movies.. And the loads of Twilight merchandise really doesnt change the fact that no matter what you do, it's the same story, and theres only so many times you can reread that same story over and over and over. And watch that same movie, over and over, until you get bored. No doubt, Twilight's gonna die out. I think the producers or whoever controls it all know this, so theyre trying to release the movies pretty quickly to suck up as much money as they can get out of this XD Because Twilight fans are freakin crazy. I love it. LOL. I notice the crazier someone is about something, the more quickly they get over it. It's like a gas tank. High speeds run out fast and low speeds last longer. Fandom is a gas tank. :P I love being around fans because I love being around enthusiasm. I went to the Harry Potter fan thing, and I was kinda bummed and bored since nobody really seemed that excited to be there! They had like, costumes and stuff but all that was going on was food-eating and discussions o___O Jessica loved it though. LOL. Aww.. I was just bored to death.. sorry Jessica! And even though we have practically NO CHANCE with them at all, at least the Jonas Brothers freakin EXIST. Jacob and Edward dont exist, and its impractical to dream of Taylor Lautner or Robert Pattinson since they're not really Jacob and Edward, they just play parts. =/ So being a crazy devoted Twilight fan has a certain degree of extreme suckiness. (LOOOOL, OR MAYBE I'M JUST THAT GIRL WHO BUMS EVERYONE OUT WITH THIS STUFF. Maybe most Twilight fans dont event think of this. But usually when you love something that much, you think about it all the time right? And wouldnt their mind wander into the future, if they think about it so much?)


Man do I miss blogging <3
I need to get on here more often


I slept over at Jessicas last weekend, and it was a blast as usual, Berkeley's always full of life. I get there around dusk (haha, I never use that word) on Friday and stayed for all of Saturday, went home early Sunday. It was suuuper fun! Highlights - Rachel made me my first ever peanutbutter+banana+HONEY sandwich, for breakfast, omg yuuuum! &Eating frozen yogurt AT NIGHT IN THE COLD SAN FRANCISCO AIR, FREEZING OUR FINGERS OFF, because of the freakin tokidoki-themed spoons and cups they had in Yogurtland over there. And we walked allll the way home and there was a football game going on and it sounded like an angry mob coming to get us because no matter where you go in Berkeley, you can hear the cheers coming from the stadium! &Reforming our tradition from a sushi breakfast before I leave, to just eating out. Since theres no sushi restaurants open in the morning... BOO!
I especially liked this Berkeley Trip cuz Rachel's friend came to visit/sleepover, and it was like a real sleepover, and we all legit stayed up till 4:30, all of us talking about anything and everything ^_^ I forgot his name though, LOL. I'm bad with names, I never really take the time to learn them in the first place. But I do remember faces :P anyway! First it was just me and Jess, and it started out at like 12AM, when we were thinking of what type of guy would go best with each of our friends XD And we did each person in the tree group, what kind of guy we would match up with each of them, and why~ Then all of us started talking about our ideal guys/girls, past relationships, etc. And what body feature is most important, aside from personality. ALL 3 OF US GIRLS CHOSE HEIGHT AS THE MOST IMPORTANT. Gotta be taller than us. And there was random other stuff like eyes, face, SMELL, non-unibrow... Rachels friend said he couldnt date a fat girl. Since he relates fat to laziness, and he's a runner so he wants someone who'd run with him and take care of their body, which does make sense to me. I bet a lot of people would criticize that, but how is not dating a fat person any different than not dating a guy who's shorter than you? They're both appearances, and people just have their certain preferences. And we talked about which of those body features we would overlook if the guy had our perfect personality. Again, we all chose height, and they added some stuff like, hand size :P I just chose height, because I'd overlook everything if I met anyone like Joe Jonas. Except maybe smell :[ But that can be fixed... ish. So I found out short guys are REALLY disadvantaged in love life, nobody wants to date a guy shorter than them. I LOVE conversations like that!! And it just went on forever, and I think I fell asleep first, while someone was talking.. Cuz the last thing I remember was someone talking, I don't remember saying Goodniiiiight or anything. I just remember talking, then.... *sleep*
I learned that (omg, this sentence sounds like an evaluation or the end of an essay) everyone's got their turnoffs. It's a fact of life~ And Van was KINDA there, talking through the wall. LOL, Van, she just stays in her room all the time and talks through the wall (its like a wall you can smush... oh nvm, this is hard to explain...). And Helen was at Disneyland! Yes, super random, so she wasnt there to join our sleepover :[ Next tiiiime. Whenever I go there, Helen's always off having a life! Psh! X]


Wow, thats a lot of typing.. i'm glad to have a really active mind because I'm never really bored. I can stare at the wall and get lost in my thoughts, even if I get pessimistic sometimes and forget that that's an option.

I wonder if I state the obvious a lot. I really do, but I just like writing it down. or thinking about it. oh, maybe everythings not really that obvious. i was thinking obvious stuff = true stuff, but if everything that was true was also obvious, the world would be so much less confused. We probably wouldnt have war or animal abuse. Peace/Love/Happiness




"Rosie Espinoza, Hannah Hylen and Jill Searby became fans of I asked "what" 20 times so now I'm just gonna pretend I heard what you said." <--- This is so Sophie (got it from facebook)
Makes me realize that no matter how "famous" you are, no matter how many concerts you go to, how lucky your life is, whether or not you have connections all over... we're all just people. Who all practically have the same quirks. :P




I'm probably gonna dream about New Moon tonight <3 I guess all Twilight fans have are dreams. Then again, that kinda goes for us Jonas fans too. Kinda only, since we can actually meet the Jonas Brothers, can actually become friends with them (even if it is ULTRA rare, its possible) but Twilighters cant meet Jacob and Edward or ever have that kind of fantasy love. night world~


oh, and i cant stop listening to this song! its been awhile since i included a song at the end of my entries. i just kept listening to this one over and over, and yesterday i realized i could lipsynch it! i wasnt even trying to learn it... man, they should really try and make teachers' lessons into songs, like miley's bone dance in hannah. phalanges i have 10, and metatarsals then, i've got some tarsals too, i'll put em in my shoe~ and now i'm up to my knee, yeah yeah yeah, thats the patella to me~ knowing that whole song would have suuuper helped me in physiology!!! whoa, i'm way off topic.

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Jump Then Fall - Taylor Swift</div>

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Rainbow Veins - Owl City</div>

^presently my 2 favorite songs from (presently) my 2 favorite musicmakers. usually i just include a random good song at the bottom without saying anything about it, but i love these too much to not leave a description ;]<input ... ></input><input ... >

Taylor swift won 3 awards tonight on the CMAs! yes, i finally got through an entire awards ceremony without changing the channel, that wasnt the teen or kids choice awards. She won Entertainer of the Year and teared up, and I started crying seeing how grateful she was in her speech <3 it was so adorable, i was so PROUD! youngest person ever to get nominated and win EOTY. so of course, my brain (and the brain of everyone else watching) was just on Kanye red alert :P i was expecting him to run out from backstage and sprinkle a little of his JOY on the situation. but theres nothing more to say, cuz everythings ok, she's got security lining the stage~




i love watching Miley interviews, they're always interesting. how could she think shes boring??






its useful to see things from an outsiders perspective.





Selena Gomez is coming to the Bay Area soon! tickets go on sale on sunday, she gets here december 20 :D after Taylor on April 11, I will have seen everyone major in concert in the Bay Area!


I love how the Jonas Brothers are addicted to touring. I'm not expecting Miley to tour all the time or JB to be as relaxed with life as Miles is, they're all different people and live their lives in different ways, but Miley in that interview up there ^ was like "people needa get up and enjoy this concert cuz I dunno when I'll be touring next!!" and I was like whoa, true.. her last tour was like 2 years ago. I guess I'm just used to the idea of a constant state of touring, since JB legit hasn't stopped touring for 2 years+... they just grab a different stage and snatch up a different name and continue touring forever XD I wonder if they can get into Guinness for the longest string of tours.. i should consult them about that. it was like... toured w/ Backstreet Boys and Jesse McCartney, [tiny tour I dont remember the name of], WYLMITE Tour, Burnin Up Tour, World Tour... theyre taking a TINY break, then Nick J's gonna possibly tour with his band and they're all gonna go back on tour again. Miley I think, makes up for her lack of touring by communication ;D Well, at least before she deleted her Twitter. She still blogs and uploads videos like crazy on Mileyworld. and gets interviewed like once per concert. Still, Jonas definitely tops her. They do interviews once in awhile, Saynows, Youtube videos, Twitter once in awhile, Facebook, they're all over the place. OKAY ENOUGH BLABBING ABOUT JONAS/MILEY :P




My  back hurts :[
I have no idea what we're gonna do on Saturday in Berkeley/SF, I think we shoud just wing it and see where the day takes us. But if we get lost we have no car... LOL. This is my official birthweek! I think our 21st birthweeks should be birthweeks too ;] Theres just too much stuff to do all in one day.

I had a test in Film today, I studied and memorized all my notes, and i seriously wrote down everything that seemed relevant, but I still feel like and know for a fact that I got a B. I can feel it in my bones. << Yeeeurgh, I hate that phrase! Sounds icky. I woulda replaced it with something else but it didnt sound right... but yeah, a B........ *twitch* I cannot get a B in this class. it's FILM for godsakes. I speak up like crazy in that class, even if I never have ever in any class before since he emphasized it so much ,saying that class participation has a lot to do with your grade. ARGHHH I'm seriously trying and I'm getting B's. THIS. SUCKS. SO. BAD. On the bright side, A on half of my history midterm, and 100% on my business midterm, but I expected that 100 from myself, he gave us the answers for godsakes. I cant rest though, until I see A's cemented on my report cards.


I hate my bangs lately, theyre so dry and its my fault XD My hair people told me not to straighten it because it'd get super damaged but I did straighten it a few times... and now its all dull and uncooperative. And stiff. :(
Maybe buying the conditioner will solve this D:




I remember when I used to take the light rail to distant city/towns. Like los gatos, and walked around alone for a bit :] it was so nice, and the time i ordered a cheese board in a coffeehouse and ate all these random cheeses from random parts of the world while reading a really good book. i have not the time anymoreee... maybe during thanksgiving vacation? or maybe ill be studying too much or resting too much then. winter break?



all time low was in SF today, i dont feel like i missed much. i dont even mind that i missed it really! I like their new CD but meh.... they might kill it live. I only go to live shows where I like the artists' music AND personality. And ATL songs are kinda mean, though catchy. "I'm gonna break your little heart, watch you take the fall, laughing all the way to the hospital, cuz theres nothing surgery can do, when i break your little heart in two." ................... uhhh... no thank you.

Owl City seems like an awesome band to go see live! <4 I remember standing on the lawn at my first JB concert ever, and I loved the ROOM. Youve got like complete freedom to twirl around without smacking someone in the face! but in seating you have the option of (1) jumping in place, (2) waving your arms around and (3) singing along. And all you can do is combine those numbers, you can do 1 and 2, 3 and 1, 2 and 3, or all of the above. :P That's like the extent of recreation at concerts. People are so packed together!! (I read that over and it made concerts seem sucky. LOL! But waving your arms around is fun I swear! and singing along with 20,000 other people who know the same words and love the same band you do, feeling inspired with 20,000 people and with your favorite band all at the same time, theres no greater feeling :D except love of course, hahahaha. but other than that, nooo greater feeling. except accomplishment >_> WELL ITS JUST A GREAT FEELING OK, it's like paying for 3 hours on cloud nine ;D) Nighttt

The day before yesterday was bday celebration day!
My favorite part, my very very favorite part, was JOY GETTING CAKED. IT WAS SO KARMA!! Because it's like Filipino tradition to shove someones face in the cake, but I really didnt want my face shoved in my cake because I have hair issues, and I can't wash my hair without it poofing up like crazy and I didnt wanna do my hair again cuz it'd take like an hour XD And Joy gets her face shoved in the cake like every year on her bday, so I expected it to be her! And she was like "Can I have an extra piece of cake ;D" all evilly, so i was watching her the whole time, and she was always acting suspicious on purpose LOL. And later that evening she was caryring cake leftovers, and it tipped over and fell ALL OVER her pants and shirt :] I LAUGHED. LIKE CRAZY. BAHAHAHAHAH KARMAAAAA! It's nice to know that karma's on my side for my bday.

And fate's on my side too <3 I was telling Dynna that I might go to "that one skating place in Milpitas" on my bday, and she advised me against it. I'm taking that as fate telling me not to go since I saw pictures and it was kinda ugly, and I'm expecting them to play rap and stuff, which I hate, and Dynna was like "tons and tons of teenyboppers hang out there", and it'd be hard to get there anyway. So noooo way am I going. I'm following the signs and not going.

I def wanna order all the souffles at Breaktime on my bday :) I dunno, maybe the All Time Low concert on Wednesday can be my afterparty? ;D
 

I'm probably the only one who thinks this, but Britney Spears' new video saddens the heck out of me. I cant believe how slutty the world is nowadays. I miss the 90s :( "Living in sin is the newest thing" ugh, gimme a break. Who is she? I don't get who she is.. I always forget that the 90's Britney believed in abstinence. LOL.
 

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"what a whore, the world's favorite prostitute. whats up with music videos being more and more whoreish in day-by-day, really is this why females are valuable, so they can be whoreish like her! Maybe women are objects, just look at them for pleasure after you're done, just discard them and find a new and younger object. Plus they are a useful tool for making you a lot of money!!!"
^^^This person's comment got bashed but what they're saying is so true.

Sometimes it scares me how Miley seems to be going down the same path Britney was 10 years ago. I don't mind Miley's slutty dancing, as long as she doesn't start singing about threesomes to please the public's intense desire for catchy beats, ad as long as she stays true to herself.




Britney went down a hip-hop/techno/pop road.. I hope Miles goes down a rock/pop/and-more-rock road. It seems like she wants to infuse more rock into her songs but her demographic/image/young fanbase isnt allowing her to, like how she promotes Kicking and Screaming as her favorite song of all the songs she made. And said that even though its like her most popular song right now, Party In The USA isnt what she really wants to sing about, and she isnt in it solely for "catchy songs make my records sell" purposes :) She wants to sing songs that mean something, and I really admire that <3 It's really easy to be a star and make catchy songs that sell out fast and all, catchy sngs are all over the place. Writers are just waiting for you to snatch up their song to be your next single. But people who step out on a limb, who make songs that MEAN SOMETHING hat arent necessarily as catchy, like Rob Thomas and Owl City.. those are artists I admire. I mean, beat is a big part of music, but that's not all there is, y'know? I'd feel as if I had a meaningless career if all my singles meant nothing to me, if all my hit songs were about sex and crap.

Me saying this stuff is unbiased by personality, though, cuz I think Britney has a good head on her shoulders after watching a special about her on E! for 2 hours or so, but seriously... the music she makes doesn't reflect that at all. I feel proud whenever someone says they like Beyonce too, because she's sexy in a classy way. Not slutty in a trailer trash way like Britney is in practically all her vids/singles.



omegle
You have disconnected.

It's so tragic when hot people go have plastic surgery and make themselves look fake and overdone.. to the point where they look like human cats.



=/



I'm trying to juggle planning a 55 people party, setting up secret santa before Nov. 14, ANOTHER presentation (asked my teacher if i could push it to November 10, lol.. presentation on my birthday), and a Midterm #2 (my history teacher is supercool, but 2 midterms is so unnecessary)... and monitoring Taylor Swift tickets :P I really need to start saving for next summer/this winter.. wondering if i should still go to Kelly Clarksons concert.. i feel like theres no point on delaying buying tickets XD since I KNOW i'm going to get there and wanna go in. HAHAH! And I cant not be on the floor :P oh dear, i've been spoiled by the floor. i remember my first concert, i didn't even care where I was, i just loved being there! bring back those days! they were cheaper :P now if i dont sit on the floor, its like "why am I not on the floor?" and the floor always seems to be jumping around and active <3 AH WHATEVER, i'll just buy whatever dinah buys. unless she buys those 300$ front rows. i bet she definitely is :P if jonas front row was only 300 i'd snatch em up in a heartbeat. theres really no point in me going in if i cant sit by dinah though, LOL, i really just wanted to see her reactions. kellys great and all, but i'm not paying 300$ to go to her concert =P eh, we'll see what happens. if desperate ticket sellers are giving away floor tickets at like 30$ on concert day, i'll buy those.


SNUGGIES HAVE BLOWN. UP. Everyone's mentioning them now!! Everyone seems to have one! JESSICA STRIKES AGAIN!! I swear, Jessica should like invest in stuff! whenever she thinks somethings cool, the rest of the world discovers it and loves it!! i remember her saying something about how Snuggies are really smart, and I was like why dont people just wear a sweater? and she was like BECAAAUSE... sweaters arent as comfy as blankets! and now everyone has one!!! Same with Jonas. Same with Twilight. Same with MLIA... whats next, Luxirare?





2012 really scares me. But the Mayan calendar cant have gone on forever, right? I mean it has to stop sometime, maybe it was just a random date where they got tired of calendaring and were like "ok, lets stop making this thing, we probably won't even be a surviving culture by then."
If the Mayans could predict the future, why arent they still alive? :P



I wonder who I have to be friends with to get into one o them fancy schmancy Hollywood parties. I should make that my 2010 goal, get into a Hollywood party by actually being INVITED and not trying to sneak in! LOL. And go to an awards ceremony.


OKOK time for school

THEME: DISNEY/JONAS!! YES!

I FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT!! THANK YOU GOD!!! What a load off my shoulders! Yesterdays blog was so crabby! my brain was a tornado of a kafuffle. I think the figuring it out was more stressful than the actual planning. It seems like fun planning elements from here, and cooking. And ordering. So here it is --
3 birthday parties. Or more like... 3 separate occasions, because my mom doesnt get along with a bunch of my friends, yet she wants to have a bday party for me <3
(1) the weekend before, at my house, my mom invites all her friends and i invite my friends (the ones my mom doesn't hate). And main event - I get a jumper! WOOOO Like one of those big bouncy jumparoundinsidebutdontyoudarebarfinhere things! I wanted something different and out of the ordinary and that's definitely different. And a fairy princess wand. fladsfgdjsfuhejd Tomorrow we're buying Jonas invitations &Now I really wish Vicky were here!!

(2) tuesday (birthday day) = running around san jose with everyone, because a lot of my friends wont be able to sleepover, much less in SF. and restaurant-hopping and souffle eating! my goal for this day is to order all the souffles at breaktime at the same time, then burn the eaten calories by laughing my butt off at random jokes :D
wednesday (afterbirthday day) - uhh... anyone wanna go with me to The Academy Is in SF? iono if i should go? it'd be fun, my first teenager concert :P

(3) weekend after my birthday - hopefully, SF with Sophie, Dinah, Jessica and both Helens! Because I doubt they'll be able to come to my house party and ironically they're my greatest friends o_o rent a hotel room maybe? or maybe sleepover at jessica/helens? i don't wanna steal jessica's thunder though, her birthday week is right after mine.




we all had our first livechat with each other yesterday and now we know how the jonas brothers feel when they do a live chat. theres like a 5 second lag between what you say and when it reaches your friends, and you have to listen for the echo to know that they've heard you! it was fun regardless, hahah. talked to vicky grace and sopherz for 2 hours! and ate cereal and blabbed about life. next livechat, sometime undetermined on thursday!


i get all excited when my twitter accounts get new followers! i could have a stalker and not even know it.. >__>



Kelly Clarkson concert with Dinah coming up in a month and a week :D

I'd just walk down the street. In the beginning, when we were thirteen 1/2, we'd play basketball in my backyard or play Nitendo at his place. His family always made yummy Italian food for dnner. i love to ride my bike, and he'd walk along next to me as i rode, singing "My Girl- By the Temptations". But instead of "my girl" he'd say "Miley talkin' 'bout Miley."

^cute



I HATE BIRTHDAYS



I wish for someone I can relate to who cares. My mom cares lots but i have nothing in common with her. she def makes everything feel okay but i want a FAMILY MEMBER who i can actually relate to. because family members just care more by default. no matter how long you've known someone, theyll never love you more than your family because of society. and ill never have anyone as close as a sister because nobodys bound to me indefinitely. who would actually put time into planning something for me. The person who plans all of everyone elses birthdays, ironically, never gets a (good) birthday planned for them. I felt HELLA bad when that happened to Xuan, and i have a feeling it's gonna happen to me, unless i plan my own freakin birthday. it sucks how i spend all this time/money on people and it feels like i dont get anything back. and ASKING for anything MORE back would be "selfish", or as my friends like to call me, "spoiled". so i dont know what i'm supposed to do because i want my birthday to be memorable, and i bet anything that i'm just gonna hang around san jose again. just like every other day. i want something DIFFERENT. and if asking for people to CARE just this once makes me spoiled, so be it. what do i do? my dream 18th birthday would be to go to disneyland with my close friends but thats so out of the question. i cant pay for all of them to go with me. i'm in the gap where i have enough money to go but not enough money to bring people with me. I WISH I HAD FRIENDS WITH MY SAME INTERESTS WITH MONEY SO WE COULD ACTUALLY GO DO STUFF TOGETHER. PHEW. been holding that in forever. or who saved for things instead of spending on every little useless thing they dont need. hahahahhhaahhhaah i'm a bitch. like thatll ever happen. thank god for venting on blogs so i dont spew all this out into peoples faces, where they'd likely say --

its MY money, dont tell me how to spend MY money. i have BETTER things to spend MYYYY money on than FUN. OMG I HAVE TO PAY FOR COLLEGE! you are sooooo spoiled. you want us to have money just so we can go with you to places. youuuu should feel lucky that you actually have money you spoiled little brat.

eff you. i love blogs. what else do i want that's unreasonable... i wanna travel on weekends. and come back in time for school. blogs dont judge on how much of a spoiled bitch you are. i love you, blog. what else.. IM TIRED OF HOMEMADE GIFTS. IF YOU REALLY CARE GO OUT AND SAVE AND BUY ME SOMETHING ILL ACTUALLY USE. HAHAHAHAHAH yeah shoot me. call me ungrateful, i probably deserve it.

THEY ACTUALLY WENT AND PUT TIME INTO A GIFT FOR YOU AND YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT. YOU ARE SOOOO SPOILED.

fine, i am. i'm tired of feeling underappreciated.

what have you done that were supposed to appreciate you for?? you hate our presents tht we put soo much time into, omg, you should just get NOTHING if you hate our presents so much.

i hate having to censor myself. i hate feelings that i feel like i cant voice. they arent gonna go away. might as well put them somewhere.

SPOILED. SPOILED. SPOILED. SPOILED. SPOILED.






i feel better.

Vickys post made me wanna make a post! But this is pointless since I'm about to leave the interweb and watch Gossip Girl! SHORTEST POST IN ETERNITY --

Gossip Girl at 9
Rachel Zoe series finale at 10
why does it have to be the series finale
i love that show too much
i wish it had more episodes

HAIKU TIME

The Rachel Zoe Show
Going away for awhile
Why does it have to :[

Smileys count for no syllables, that is not cheating, bye
I'm starting to hate "bye" and "kthanksbye", really overused


TAYLOR SWIFT IS COMING TO MY CITY DHWOVBASOHVUBWJDAN
AND SINCE I FOUND THIS OUT TAYLOR FANS HAVE BEEN POPPING UP ALL OVER THE PLACE
OOPS THIS IS ALL IN CAPS
MIGHT AS WELL MAKE THE REST IN CAPS
I DONT WANNA RETYPE THIS
COURTNEY, HER LITTLE SISTER, CAN LAI, AND NGOC ARE ALL LIKELY GOING TO THE CONCERT
BDWIGFNEWJKVHNLDKSBVJLJS I CANT WAIT HOLYCRAPTAYLORSWIFT
AFTER THIS, I WILL HAVE SEEN ALL MY FAVORITE ARTISTS AT CONCERTS IN MY HOMETOWN!!
CAPS IS STARTING TO LOSE ITS EFFECT, I'M GONNA STOP NOW




omegle